How to create a life you love when you hate your 9-5
practical steps to accessing more joy, hope, and a greater sense of purpose.
Hello, and welcome to July’s installment of Ask Honey.
Today we’re diving into:
How to navigate a soul-sucking job while staying true to your values.
Practical steps to accessing more hope and a greater sense of purpose.
How to create the life you want to live now, even if you hate your 9-5.
Have a question? Submit it here for the chance to appear in next month’s Ask Honey.
A quick note: I am not a therapist or professional advisor. The thoughts and suggestions I share are based on my personal experiences and reflections. I encourage you to approach this with an open heart, take what resonates with you, and simply leave the rest. Let’s get into it!
dear honey,
my job is basically just another cog in the consent-manufacturing machine. i work at a notable national media outlet (U.S.) run by zionists and right-wing sympathizers, though numerous media bias surveys have labeled it "fair" (bullshit).
it's my first job out of college. i've been here more than four years and i'm paid dirt. i struggle with creativity, community and independence in this job. i'm endlessly micromanaged, guided by poor management and rarely have the opportunity to pitch my own stories. i've been seeking a way out for two of those four years.
because of the shitty experience i've had at this company, i'm very picky about the jobs i apply to. i've always had a strong sense of justice and advocacy, and i want to bring my skills to an outlet, non-profit, whatever that shares these same values. the problem is these kind of places are few and far between with little new job postings. and even when i have applied, i've never heard back. this leaves me feeling burnt out and inadequate.
i guess i'm not looking for job-seeking or career advice. i've kind of settled on working my present job for a bit longer to get more solid years of experience on my resume. i just want to know how to not let this job be so soul-sucking, and how to not feel so hopeless when trying to pursue new opportunities to no avail.
especially now as the genocide in gaza rages on, i feel ashamed for participating in the narratives and content spewed by this company. i've advocated for stories that try to shed some truth on the crisis in gaza, but little bandwidth and lack of support from my editors often doesn't let this come to fruition.
part of me just wants to say, "fuck it," quit and get out of there. but i have student loans to pay, medical expenses to take care of, astronomical rent to make and so on. isn't it fucked up how we have to surrender parts of ourselves in order to have a livelihood, to proliferate the banality of evil just to eat? this is all very, "woe is me," but it is, at least, cathartic to share this experience and know that it will be read by someone who might care or relate.
how can i find peace in this?
—frustrated journalist
Hi, frustrated journalist.
First of all, yes. It is fucked up that we have to surrender parts of ourselves in order to have a livelihood.
And yet, still. We have a choice. We almost always have a choice, and we shouldn’t jump to rob ourselves of that agency.
You make a choice every day by staying at your job. I don’t say this to shame you, rather to show you that what you’re using to bludgeon yourself with, you could instead use to set yourself free.
The way you talk about your situation presents two stark options:
Stay at this job and die a thousand deaths each day.
Find your dream job and jump ship, to a place where you finally achieve joy and self-fulfillment.
But let’s pull this apart a bit further.
There are not just two jobs in this world, the one you have and the one you dream of. There are myriad jobs that might not fulfill you as much as your mythical dream job will, but they also won’t deplete you as much as your current soul-sucking one already does.
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